Death, Dying, Grief and Mourning

            "Death is always the same,
                               but each man dies in his own way."

Carson McCullers, Clock Without Hands, 1960

   

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An Anthology by  Adrienne Nater

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Walt Whitman, Death of a Pennsylvania Soldier, 1865

 

Death of Frank H. Irwin
Death of a Soldier

Death of Frank H. Irwin:

Letter to the Mother of Frank H. Irwin, Company E, 93d Pennsylvania —

Died May 1, ‘65

Dear Madam: No doubt you and Frank’s friends have heard the sad fact of his death in hospital here, through his uncle, or the lady from Baltimore, who took his things. (I have not seen them, only heard of them visiting Frank.) I will write you a few lines — as a casual friend that sat by his death-bed. Your son, Corporal Frank H. Irwin, was wounded near Fort Fisher, Virginia, March 25th, 1865 — the wound was in the left knee, pretty bad. He was sent up to Washington, was reciev’d in ward C, Armory-square hospital, March 28th — the wound became worse, and on the 4th of April the leg was amputated a little above the knee, the operation was perform’d by Dr. Bliss, one of the best surgeons in the army — he did the whole operation himself— there was a good deal of bad matter gather’d— the bullet was found in the knee, For a couple of weeks afterwards he was doing pretty well. I visited and sat with him frequently, as he was fond of having me. The last ten or twelve days of April I saw that his case was critical. He previously had some fever, with cold spells. The last week in April he was much of the time flighty— but always mild and gentle. He died first of May. The actual cause of death was pyaemia (the absorption of matter in the system instead of its discharge.)

Frank, as far as I saw, had everything requisite in surgical treatment, nursing, & c, He had watches much of the time. He was so good and well-behaved and affectionate, I myself liked him very much. I was in the habit of coming in afternoons and sitting by him, and soothing him, and he liked to have me— liked to put his arm out and lay his hand on my knee — would keep it so a long while. Toward the last he was more restless and flighty at night — often fancied himself with his regiment — by his talk sometimes seem’d as if his feeling were hurt by being blamed by his officers for something he was entirely innocent of — said, "I never in my life was thought capable of such a thing, and never was." At other times he would fancy himself talking as it seemed to children or such like, his relatives I suppose, and giving them good advise; would talk to them a long while.

All the time he was out of his head not one single bad word or idea escaped him. It was remark’d that many a man’s conversations in his senses was not half as good as Frank’s delirium. He seem’d quite willing to die — he had become very weak and had suffer’d a good deal, and was perfectly resign’d, poor boy. I do not know his past life, but I feel as if it must have been good. At any rate what I saw of him here, under the most trying circumstances, with a painful wound, and among strangers, I can say that he behaved so brave, so composed, and so sweet and affectionate, it could not be surpass’d. And now like many other noble and good men, after serving his country as a soldier, he has yielded up his young life at the very onset in her service. Such things are gloomy — yet there is a text, "God doeth all things well" — the meaning of which, after due time, appears to the soul.

I thought perhaps a few words, though from a stranger, about you son, from one who was with him at the last, might be worthwhile — for I loved the young man, though I but saw him immediately to lose him, I am merely a friend visiting hospitals occasionally to cheer the wounded and sick.

W.W.

   
 

Adrienne Nater, 2008

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